Grandma and Grandpa Lewis came to live with us when I was a teenager. Grandma had Alzheimer’s disease and Grandpa had Dementia. Both had lost parts of their memory and their ability to care for themselves. I don’t even think they remembered me most of the time.
It was my responsibility to sometimes watch and care for them. Sometimes I was responsible for taking them to the bathroom, helping them get dressed, fixing them their meals and them helping them to eat. Grandpa was always grateful to us for our service to him and Grandma. He would often tell my dad that he needed to take me fishing, or give a few bucks for serving both him and Grandma.
I never knew Grandpa very well previously. We moved to Utah when I was 5 years old. As a family we would try to visit Grandma and Grandpa in Arizona at least once every year. I looked forward to those visits. What I do remember about Grandpa was that he was quiet and kind, especially to Jacob and I. But it was during his stay with us that my feelings for grandpa really developed. I grew to love him very much!
Eventually Grandpa grew very really ill. He got so sick that we had to keep him in a hospital in Orem, UT. One evening my dad and I went to visit Grandpa at the hospital. We both stood by his bed trying to comfort him. After a few minutes my dad and I were on our way out the door, when my Grandpa called me back to his bedside and said to me “Hun, come here”. When I reached Grandpas bedside he grabbed my hand and put it in both of his hands and said “I will always be with you hun”. That night Grandpa died. I remember thinking that he didn’t know who I was or that he thought I was someone else when he said that. But I know better now. I have several times since then felt a presence in my home, and I have felt that it is Grandpa coming to check on me and his little great grandson, Eddie Montgomery.
My mom was an amazing mother and teacher to all of her twelve children. I remember well the many things she taught me throughout the years. She took her role as a teacher and missionary of the gospel seriously and frequently taught us in parables and metaphors. From her I learned that I could pray to a loving Heavenly Father when I needed love, help and guidance. I knew what was expected of me as a daughter of Heavenly Father, and whom I could turn to when I made mistakes.
My mom was extremely compassionate, understanding and affectionate. This was especially evident whenever one of us (her children) became ill. I remember her laying me on the couch and turning on my favorite old movies and her trips to the store to get medicine, popsicles and ice cream. Later at night she would lay by my bed and wake up periodically to check on me. She had the ability to make one feel as though they were the most important person in the entire world!
My mom endured much pain throughout her life. She was pregnant 17 times and gave birth to twelve children. She often expressed how grateful she was that God allowed her to bring us into this life. She suffered from many illnesses including fibromyalgia and severe headaches to name but a few. She also had a back surgery which left a long scar going from one side of her back to the other. She always had a smile on her face and she never complained. In the latter four years of her life she wasn’t able to get out of bed that much, due to her illness and the intensity of the pain she was constantly in. In those four years she looked as though she had aged 10 years at least. It was difficult to see her in so much pain. But despite all she endured she continued to reply in her cheery voice “I’m good!” whenever I required about her health.
What I miss most about my mother are her genuine warm hugs, and her cheery and sweet voice telling me that she loved me. The last conversation I had with my mom was about a week or so before she died. In this conversation I was telling her I would see her again real soon in just a few weeks, to which my mom started crying. I didn’t understand her tears then, but I think I understand them now. I have no doubt she felt time was running out, and that she needed to spend as much time as possible telling her children how much she loved them.
My mom died at age 69. She got all her mothering done on this earth. I feel comforted to know that she lives! I only wish that she be permitted to peek in us (her children) from time to time. I love you mom and feel so blessed to be your daughter. I will try and follow the amazing example you left, and will pass on your legacy to my children and grandchildren and great grandchildren.
